Re: Your appearance on Vh1 Hip Hop Honors (2006)

Kimberly Jones,

I don't know what I was doing to completely forget that you were on Vh1's Hip Hop Honors, but I caught part of it while I was doing nothing on the Internet.


I liked what you wore to the show.

Too bad it took jail for you to wear that sweatsuit (methinks).

I'll keep that in mind if you ever lose the weight and show up on Go Fug Yourself anytime soon. I'll be sure to send you a year's supply of Popeyes courtesy of Beyonce. You know she doesn't want to be caught with a bucket of that stuff unless she wanted to look like the Stay-Puff Marshmallow Man in her next video for B'Day (which will double as a commerical for Ritalin).


Penny Woods

(Pics: Vh1.com screencap, Ms. Special)

Re: Your idea of singing

Dear Sting (the musician),


Tell me if I'm wrong (considering that some people have slammed me for not reading quotes in context), but word is you think that Beyonce and Justin Timberlake's music is soulless.

And this is coming from a man who did a song for this soundtrack as well as this song with Craig David and this lame video?

It's so easy to tell you off with a bad tantric sex joke. I'll resist.


Penny Woods

(Pics: Wikipedia, MS Special)

Re: Yet another cover. Please stop making me address your damn covers

Beyonce, honey,

I was dismayed at your latest cover for your latest single.


Look, I appreciate that you really care about defying the stereotype that African-Americans are more prone to be "alligator bait" than any other race.

But I thought "Ring the Alarm" was about...well, it's not about you in an ugly bathing suit in heels with two badly-placed alligators in a swamp. I think the song's about a woman trying to keep an unfaithful man.

Problem is, I don't see the man, so are you trying to scare him too? I mean, the ugly bathing suit's enough to make him jump in the swamp and kill himself. However he dies is up to your imagination, uh, Bee.


Penny Woods

(Tip: DListed)