Saturday, March 25, 2006

Re: "Kryptonite"

Dear Jim Larranaga (head coach of the George Mason Patriots,

This has been bothering me all night.

I mean, no one's condemned your lack of rap knowledge.

...I think the best part is that Larranaga was actually familiar with this song. He knows what's hot on the streets.
Seriously, do you even know what "Kryptonite" is about?

It sure is hell ain't about Superman.


Okay, okay, so I'm a little bitter. But the UNC women might just
win it all, which will be just as sweet.

The issue at hand is that you only know a rap song because of a Superman reference.

I'm stunned that you don't know that 3 Doors Down song of the same name. You know, with that song and a few others, you could have had your "I'm Lex Luthor and you are my minions" mini-mix going on by downloading all the songs from the iTunes music store with the word "kryptonite" in them. You would have made everyone shaved their head* and wear business suits instead of warm-up suits before games. And then at halftime you would have thrown chunks of painted green rocks you found outside the arena you were playing at and thrown them into the opposing team's locker room, hoping that the "kryptonite" would weaken them.

Oh, shit, I just said too much. I'll stop now before
Deadspin embarrasses you again.

*
Yes, I remember the 2003-2004 post-season at UNC when everyone on the team went bald, so don't ask.


Penny Woods

(Pics: GoMason.com, MS Special)

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sorry hun, the UNC women are going down.

Penny Woods said...

I know it's hard to tell how well we kick ass on the court because we don't have those nice Dook television packages, but we will beat the Lady Vols. ;)