Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Re: "Hips Don't Lie"

Dear Shakira,

I had the misfortune of seeing you on TRL yesterday. Luckily I had the mute button off so I wouldn't hear you screaming on top of screaming morons for MTV's "spring break."

However, I noticed that I had not heard this new single you put out.

I noticed that it was a remake of Claudette Ortiz's song that was featured on the Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights soundtrack, and that movie was so bad I never finished it. Therefore I don't recall Ortiz's version.

So I went to your website to listen to the song.

And guess what?

I suggest you don't do remakes of songs originally done by Black people, because you somehow sap the soul originally in the songs in your hair.

Of course, the general viewing audience of TRL that thinks like "Kelly-Clarkson-and-Fall-Out-Boy-is-the-best-EVAR!" doesn't mind, as they cannot listen to music found on any other place but MTV (and possibly Fuse).

Penny Woods

(Pics: Shakira Media, Wikipedia, MS Special)

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