Monday, February 27, 2006

Re: Tennessee

Dearest Jan,

I remember reading on Janet Online (or some Janet Jackson fan website--apparently, the Janet Jackson fansites don't like to keep archives the way that Mariah Daily religously does) that you were supposed to star in a movie known as Tennessee. The movie was to be produced by Lee Daniels and was supposed to be shooting in March.

Then it was reported that the movie fell through.

Apparently the movie is reshooting again, and guess who they have on board now?

Yes, Jan, you've been replaced in a movie by a woman who's been in one of the worst movies known to mankind, and no matter how many award shows she decides to accept her RSVP for The Emancipation of Mimi, that movie will still be a blemish on her career.

Okay, so she did an okay job on movies like Wisegirls and State Property 2, but come on, Jan! You've been in Poetic Justice. Nutty Professor 2: The Klumps. Both of those movies grossed more than Glitter, Jan! Hell, those movies are better than Glitter, Jan! How could you not be involved with a movie that's being produced by the guy who did Monster's Ball? Monster's Ball, Jan, Monster's Ball!

When you get to your house in LA, wherever the hell it is nowadays, I want you to sit in the corner for at least a day. The one stipulation: the only people allowed to touch you are your dogs, if you still have dogs.

You've disappointed me, Jan, but I still love ya,

Penny Woods

(Pics: Janet Online, Mariah Daily, MS Special)

(Special thanks: Miss Janet--RIP and Mariah Daily for the heads-up)

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